Domestic violence can happen to anyone.

When you see pictures or videos of victims of domestic violence, you often see pictures of women and children. But in reality, domestic violence can happen to anyone, any time, anywhere. 

For women, abuse can be a serious threat. Abuse can come in many forms, often involving threats, intimidation, hurtful words and other behaviors to control the victim.  For women, this also can often come from an imbalance of power - physically and financially.  

For children, this imbalance of power may be even greater, as there may be an even stronger sense of dependability on the adult abuser (though sometimes that can also happen between siblings, especially those with greater age differences).  Children may not know that what they are experiencing is abnormal.  They may be too afraid to say anything. They may be too afraid to lose the provider that they have.  

For men, the abuse may often be overlooked.  After all, our society sometimes tends to think of men as stronger, more independent, and more likely to be the aggressor than women and children.  Therefore, in situations when men are the victims of abuse (physical, emotional or otherwise), they may be told to “man up.” Men may also be ashamed or made to feel ashamed to reach out for help, and may end up suffering in silence more so than the other victim groups. 

Regardless of who the victim may be, many may not show or may choose to hide evidence of abuse for one reason or another.  They may put on a face of normalcy.  They may try to live a normal life to get away from the horrors behind the closed doors.  Many may even become protective of their abuser - otherwise known as the Stockholm Syndrome.

When you are involved in a family law case - may it be divorce or child custody - it is important to tell your attorney of any history of abuse in the relationship.  Not only may this help ensure that your attorney can take the appropriate steps to protect you and your children during the process, but it may also be important when your attorney strategizes for your case.  For example, even if you ultimately end up with a joint parenting plan, you may want to have orders entered for exchanges to be held in public places.  You may even be able to request for supervised visitation for children to protect them. 

Domestic violence is a serious matter.  No one should suffer from it. No one deserves it. And, it is extremely important to recognize it, take precautions to protect yourself and/or your children, and to get the proper help for you and/or your children to heal from it. 

The content provided in this blog is for informational purposes only.  This is not legal advice, and your viewing of this blog does not form any attorney-client relationship. 

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