Having trouble co-parenting? Get a parenting facilitator!

Sometimes we just need a little help.  This is especially true when it comes to co-parenting. This is even more true if the parties did not get along in terms of parenting styles or personalities. Thankfully, you don’t always need to go back to court to get your problems resolved.

Under Texas Family Code Sec. 153.601(3-a), the Court can appoint a parenting facilitator to a case involving child custody issues. The appointment may be made as a result of the request of one or both of the parties, or on the Court’s own motion. 

One of the benefits of working with a parenting facilitator is that the meetings are informal. Unlike being in court, you don’t have to follow any specific procedures or deadlines required by law.  A parenting facilitator is required to comply with the standard of care as required by the person’s professional license. 

So, what can a parenting facilitator do?  

The duties and limitations of a parenting facilitator are about the same as the ones for a parenting coordinator, which is defined under Texas Family Code Sec. 153.606(a).  Namely, the duties of the parenting facilitator are limited to matters that will aid the parties in:

1. identifying disputed issues;

2. reducing misunderstandings;

3. clarifying priorities;

4. exploring possibilities for problem solving;

5. developing methods of collaboration in parenting;

6. understanding parenting plans and reaching agreements about parenting issues to be included in a parenting plan;

7. complying with the court’s order regarding conservatorship or possession of and access to the child;

8. implementing parenting plans;

9. obtaining training regarding problem solving, conflict management, and parenting skills; and

10. settling disputes regarding parenting issues and reaching a proposed joint resolution or statement of intent regarding those disputes.

In addition, a parenting facilitator may also monitor the parties’ compliance with a court order.  However, a parenting facilitator may not modify any order, judgment, or decree.

So, why do you need a parenting facilitator? 

Let’s say the two of you cannot determine where the child should go to school, but you must make the decision jointly.  In this case, a parenting facilitator can help determine what each party’s goals are, find some middle ground, and help the parties move away from fighting and on to problem solving.  A parenting facilitator is particularly useful when one or both of the parties have found new significant others, or when feelings are still hurt and bitter. 

Can you afford a parenting facilitator?

That depends on who you use.  Usually, the cost of the parenting facilitator is split between both parties (with each party paying his or her own half.)  The cost of a parenting facilitator can vary widely, ranging from $200 to $400 per hour.  Of course, there are some that are more or less expensive. If you are low income, you may be able to find someone who can do it on a sliding scale or reduced rate.  

Is it worth it?

Going to court may be a slow process, and can also get costly depending on how long and complicated the situation is.  Working with a parenting facilitator can eliminate some of the upfront cost, with faster results. The parenting facilitator can also help parties to learn to settle differences on their own in the long run, decreasing the chance of the parties having to resort to litigation in the future. 

What’s the downside?

The downside to using a parenting facilitator is that you may still need to hire an attorney to modify your parenting plan once you reach an agreement if the changes are to be substantive.  You want to make sure that there is a court order in place of any substantive changes so that it becomes enforceable by law.  The good news is that those types of modification are usually less expensive than an actual legal battle.  Another downside to a parenting facilitator is that the process is not confidential.  Therefore, anything you tell the parenting facilitator may get back to the other side or be used later in Court.

If you don’t know if a parenting facilitator is right for you, or if you have questions about the process, you should speak with an attorney about it.  This is especially true if you don’t already have a parenting facilitator appointed for your case, since getting once appointed will require filing legal documents. 

The content provided in this blog is for informational purposes only.  This is not legal advice, and your viewing of this blog does not form any attorney-client relationship. 

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